A Heartfelt Goodbye to Akasha ♡
A Heartfelt Goodbye to Akasha
Dear Community,
Jenn here, and as I write this, I find myself at an unexpected crossroads. It’s time to say goodbye to a chapter I never imagined would end this way—goodbye to Akasha, my home, my community, and the many material things I once thought defined success. But perhaps the most difficult goodbye is to the deep, beautiful connections and trust that I’ve built with so many of you. Losing that relationship is the hardest part. Authenticity, transparency, connection and integrity have always been at the heart of Akasha, and I am so sorry to have let you down.
This letter comes with the same transparency that Akasha was built upon. I owe it to myself, to you, and to the very essence of Akasha to share where we stand. So many of you have reached out, asking if I’m ok, and the honest answer is—no, I’m not ok. But I will be. I know there’s something on the other side of this.
We had two great years in Erie and your overwhelming support allowed me to pursue my dream of expanding into a reimagined wellness center. Niwot Akasha was everything I hoped it would be and I’m so proud and thankful that I got to chase my dream. Many people never get that chance, or take the risk. Along the way I discovered that running a small business in this economy is hard….. so hard. Things didn’t go as planned, not for lack of support, but I could never get on top of the bills or logistics.
It’s with a heavy heart that I share I’ve made the decision to let go of Akasha. She has been my teacher, my guide, my deepest work in learning to alchemize the most painful parts of life into something meaningful. But the toll on me and my family has been astronomical. I gave everything to Akasha—my time, my energy, my soul—and yet, the cost has been higher than I ever imagined. While I hoped to bring healing to others, somewhere along the way I lost myself. I must now prioritize my own well-being and that of my family.
I did everything I could to hold it together. I sacrificed, I pushed through, and I kept fighting, believing that I could keep it alive. But after I found myself spinning out and facing a life-threatening health crisis earlier this year, we were faced with a choice that felt like a turning point. My husband received an out-of-state job offer, offering a glimmer of hope to stop the financial hemorrhaging that I had brought upon our family who had wholeheartedly supported me in pursuing my dream. The debt had consumed us and his new out of state job was our last chance at something that could save us from complete devastation.
So, we made the difficult decision to let go of everything here in Colorado and begin a new chapter elsewhere. The emotional weight of that decision has been heavy, and there was nothing easy about this transition. Every choice I have had to make for the last 6 months has felt like moving a mountain. The stakes were so high. While my family moved on to rebuild, I remained here in Colorado, trying desperately to salvage what I could, fighting for the life of Akasha. I ended up splitting my time between both homes, which I quickly realized was not sustainable. In the end, I’ve lost Akasha and the home I once built around it.
In the process, our family has faced immense personal and financial hardship. Medical bills for all of us are overwhelming. My husband’s previously managed epilepsy resurfaced due to stress, with terrifying and almost devastating consequences. My son, Zehn’s autoimmune condition and other health conditions have resurfaced. While he is technically an adult, this move has now forced us out of state and away from him, which continues to break my mama heart over and over. My daughter, Sasha has been without the vital support she needs due to financial and time constraints. She is also struggling with unexplainable somatic symptoms and needs her mom back. I never imagined that a business meant to foster healing would come with such consequences.
I carry a deep sense of guilt and sadness, but also, a sense of profound understanding. Akasha has taught me lessons I’m still learning to process—about surrender, about balance, about the importance of prioritizing the self. The guilt of not being able to do more for my family, community and for this business is heavy, but I know in my heart that this is part of the journey—the alchemy of transformation that Akasha has offered me.
My health reached a breaking point in the past month, and I was faced with an undeniable reality: my mental and physical well-being were at risk. The weight of it all was no longer just unsustainable—it was pushing me toward a darkness I couldn’t navigate alone. There were moments I wasn’t sure I could keep going. But through this, I’ve found a kind of clarity. Sometimes, the most painful decisions are the ones that set us free.
Akasha was more than a business to me—it was a lifeline when I was at my lowest. She was my sobriety project. I walked away from alcohol forever during the pandemic, after mommy wine culture, unresolved trauma and undiagnosed mental health conditions almost killed me. March 30th, 2020 laying unresponsive with a .417 blood alcohol level, somehow I was given another chance. While the world shut down, I checked myself into rehab and began the fight for my life. Realizing quickly the relationship between body, mind, spirit and unresolved trauma, I looked around and clearly saw a world that was becoming increasingly disconnected and touch deprived. As I began to heal, I saw a way to use my hardships and pain as fuel to add something beautiful to a world that felt so isolating, lonely and scary.
Akasha was born from that battle. She became the space where I could offer the love and healing I so desperately needed while also offering a service to my community. I am only one person and can’t do much on a large scale to fix the dysfunction in this broken world, but this felt like one small measurable thing I could do to make a noticable difference to those in my direct orbit . I opened my doors Aug 1, 2021 and you all instantly supported me. It was beautiful and magical and took my breath away.
Akasha’s instant success was more than I ever dreamed of, coming out of one of the darkest periods of my life. In the beginning I felt like I received as much healing from you as you did from me. It was such a beautiful exchange. But as time went on, I lost that balance and gave too much of myself. In giving to others, I lost parts of myself that now need to be rediscovered. While I am proud to say I’ve been able to maintain my sobriety through all of this, I’ve again found myself fighting for my life in different, but no less
This journey has shown me the importance of mental health—how crucial it is to ask for help before it’s too late. We often wait until things are unbearable to reach out, but I hope my story encourages others to take care of themselves sooner. Mental well-being is just as important as physical health, and I’ve learned the hard way that we can’t ignore it.
To those with outstanding gift certificates, I sincerely apologize for the difficulty this puts you in. I’m doing everything I can to make things right, and I invite you to join me for the estate and retail liquidation sale, where you can recover the value of your certificates and find holiday gifts.
In hindsight, I should have set expiration dates to prevent this situation from growing to the point where fulfilling it would be impossible. For that I apologize profusely. So many lessons on this journey. My business accounts are empty, and after draining all our savings trying to hold on, there’s no way to issue refunds. My assets—my home, my cars—are gone. We are in the throes of bankruptcy. Everything I had was poured into trying to keep Akasha alive, but I have nothing left to recover except the opportunity to start fresh.
Every word of kindness, every purchase at the liquidation sale, every donation made will help my family as we transition to the next phase of our lives. I am deeply grateful for any support you can offer.
While Akasha may no longer exist in the way it once did, the lessons she’s given me and the community we’ve built together will stay with me always. I will continue to share her story, as I believe there is more to learn from this journey—both for me and for all of us.
As I move forward into this new chapter, I want to thank you, from the depths of my heart, for all the love, trust, and support you’ve shown me over the years. You’ve been a part of something incredibly special, and while this is goodbye for now, the love will always remain.
With love and gratitude,
Jenn